JOKE: Before Bed

[Feingo Ferinton]

A man and his wife are laying in bed together in the early hours of the night. The woman has already dozed off, and the man is reading. Then, the man reaches over between his wifes legs and fingers her. She come out of her sleep, looks at him and gives him a coy smile before asking, "You want some?"

The man shakes his head while keeping his eyes on his book. "No hun, I just needed to wet my finger to turn the page."

[Tadelesh]

:lol: Don't know why he didn't just wet it in his mouth like everyone else.

[Ashton Gray]

That one's a bit disgusting, in my opinion. ::yuk::

[Lidia_Apricot]

What!? He must have a very dry mouth or do not have enough saliva to turn the page and use his wife's......yeah....If I were her, I'll push him out of the bed and make sure he stays there -___-#. *grabs a bat*

Edit: And maybe, I'll say to him: "Hey! When you are ready to turn the next page, just jerk off!" XD

[Cole Blacke]

:lol: I doubt they occupied the same bed for much longer.........

[Drofgod969]

:lol: that is all i can do right now and say :lol:

[Tearlach]

Lidia_Apricot wrote: What!? He must have a very dry mouth or do not have enough saliva to turn the page and use his wife's......yeah....If I were her, I'll push him out of the bed and make sure he stays there -___-#. *grabs a bat*

Edit: And maybe, I'll say to him: "Hey! When you are ready to turn the next page, just jerk off!" XD

No can do. That stuff is used for the book's binding as it is. But may be t'is a salty sea tale! Moby Dick perhaps? :roll:

[Cole Blacke]

(*stares at book in hands*).......May I ask why you had to do that? :roll:

[Tearlach]

Cole Blacke wrote: (*stares at book in hands*).......May I ask why you had to do that? :roll:
Knowledge is power and power corrupts :twisted: ::bouncy::

[Feingo Ferinton]

Well then, I suppose everyone is just dieing to know how the mans wife get back at him, so here it is. :twisted:


The next night, the woman is sitting in bed, reading a book of her own while her husband showers. Five minutes later, her husband walks out with a towel around his waiste and walks over to the mirror. He then drops the towel and proceeds to admire his naked body. He turns to his wife and says. "Look honey, 200 pounds of pure dynamite."

The wife looks up from her book and responds, "Fuckin' shame there's only a one-inch fuse."

[Tadelesh]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Serves him right.

[Drofgod969]

:shock: :lol: ouch...

[Cole Blacke]

:lol: (*standing ovation*) BRAVO.

[skybourne87]

lol

[Cassandre]

Tearlach wrote: Lidia_Apricot wrote: What!? He must have a very dry mouth or do not have enough saliva to turn the page and use his wife's......yeah....If I were her, I'll push him out of the bed and make sure he stays there -___-#. *grabs a bat*

Edit: And maybe, I'll say to him: "Hey! When you are ready to turn the next page, just jerk off!" XD

No can do. That stuff is used for the book's binding as it is. But may be t'is a salty sea tale! Moby Dick perhaps? :roll:

My sister and I have nothing to do, and she's visiting my villa (duh) and so we were just going through the jokes, and she saw that. I looked at he, and she was just staring at the door to my office, which has a bunch of books in it, and she was saying, over and over, "Must not lick books. Must not lick books."

[Rune174]

heh, I feel sory for the guy if the woman decided to retaliate. A woman's vengeance is no laughing manner.

[Cassandre]

Hell hath no fury as a woman pissed.

I know its actually hell hath no fury as a woman scorned, but, hey, it works out both ways.

[xxthalexx]

skybourne87 wrote: lol
If your not going to put some positive feedback, dont post. saying the synonym for laugh out loud, simply tells me your just seeking to up your posts and nothing else. Great joke by the way, gave me a good laugh. But a bad move on his part

[henkcobra]

haha these are good